Why Your Partner Overreacts (And You Do, Too)

When anyone "overreacts," the chances are that their reaction is in proportion to what they subconsciously think has just happened. The present situation has automatically triggered some existing beliefs or fears. In a very real sense, their reaction is not about what just happened, but about what their past has led them to understand from such a situation or interaction.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/what-works-and-why/201912/why-your-partner-overreacts-and-you-do-too

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